What is My Goal?

I have a fear of heights. I get woozy and feel faint on tall bridges and on the ledges of winding mountain roads.

Tuesday I attempted to tackle a High Ropes Course at camp. I didn’t fear the height because I was safely harnessed to a rope that was being held by a strong young man belaying me. Yet I felt extreme anxiety over the fact that my old body might not have the physical strength to accomplish the task.

This morning I looked up self-confidence in the dictionary. It said that self-confidence wasn’t just a belief in one’s ability to succeed. It also included an acceptance of the consequences or outcomes of the situation, be they good or bad. Self-confidence is the ability to cope with and accept whatever outcome may arise. It is about enjoying the process, and accepting the outcome. In order to do that, I need to refocus my goal. My goal needs to be on the process, not winning.

As a Christian, God calls me to attempt things I do not feel capable of accomplishing. At those times I sit at the crossroads, like I did at camp. Do I want to try, enjoy the process, and trust that whether I succeed in the task or not, God has me there doing it for His good purpose? Is my goal to serve where and when He calls me, or just where I can guarantee a perfect and successful program or ministry each and every time with absolute expertise? Do I want to miss the blessing of the process because I have no guarantee I can succeed? No guarantee that I will have all the answers or skills? No guarantee of perfection?!?

I wonder if people say no to serving in one of our children’s ministries because they fear not being successful, fear not having all the answers or skills, fear not being perfect.

Although I am physically sore from the High Ropes Course, and although it took me at least twice as long as it took my peers, and although I didn’t catch the trapeze at the end, I enjoyed the process. I am not discouraged that I didn’t conquer the course. My goal was to try, one step at a time. I thoroughly enjoyed the adventure!

Lord, please help all of us to look at the adventures you offer us in ministry, focus on the process you have set before us, and attempt great things with You!